It was almost a week after the #Hokkolorob movement in September. I was lying lazily in my office armchair, when all of a sudden my Hangout window popped up “Are you from Jadavpur University?”, asked my project supervisor.“Well, that increases my expectations from your work all the more”, she added before I answered her back even and my chest swelled several inches almost readily :p.
Unfortunately, at that point of time, I regretted immensely for lying to her a week ago, as I applied for my leave to participate in the protest march!
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Once, while discussing about the Lacanian concept of “Ideal Ego” and “Ego Ideal”elaborately, our professor suggested that, there are certain instances when a few students of our University, being overwhelmed by their identity (inside the University campus without which they are nothing) are afraid to step outside the University walls!
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Being highly practical in nature, I considered myself to be immensely intelligent as the JU spell failed entrap me into any form of emotional trauma. The realization first occurred to me, the day I joined my first full-time job.
Our frankness with the professors,have been often marked as “disrespectful” attitude by the leading news agencies of Kolkata; the right to behave freely and naturally inside the campus have been suggested as aggressiveness; the gender equality, that our beloved professors have been promoting, since the past few decades have been suggested as some form of seduction by the male chauvinists.
But, it is needless to say, that these Devils failed to affect the academic ranking of our University, even though they did successfully influence the opinion of the common people a bit, about the student’s movement.
Perhaps, no other professors, of any academic institution across the globe, can ever read the minds of the students so well. I was apparently shocked by their analytical skills at times, as how exactly they can decode what I am thinking! Then I realized, that it is actually because they have been practicing psychoanalysis for several years 😉 :-p !
#I did not even realize, how and when I too started expecting the same from the people in and around me.
Then, it was the day of September 16th! Throughout my academic career, I have NEVER EVER participated in any form of protests or political campaigns. But, when I saw the image of my batchmate’s hand being broken by the police, and the news footages that flashed the young female students being beaten notoriously and touched in private areas I could bear it no more!
My parents(much like several other parents) suggested I should stay away from such protests, as I CAN never change the reality, by marching across the city and chanting the slogans; but, I said, neither will it if I sit at home or office, and criticize the social scenario with chai and pakora! Unfortunately, at that point of time, I did not have the guts to mail my project supervisor that I want a leave because I have to attend the protest rally; rather, I emailed her that I was extremely sick, and I had an appointment with the Doctor!
As I reached Maidan, I saw hundreds of people marching proudly towards the destination, and many of them were not even a student of our University! I saw an old and weak lady, (who had probably no reason to join the protest) who sang and walked miles for the cause; I saw the numerous victims (with their severe injuries) walking miles together hand in hand ; I saw some of the reputed Tollywood actresses, filmmakers and theatre personalities (who wasted their entire day) stand and walk with us for the cause despite the heavy rain! Even though I felt proud, to witness such an event (by fighting with my family), I felt upset inside, for not being able to gather ample courage and mail the actual reason why I needed the leave to the authorities!
It was only a week later, as she asked me if I was a student of Jadavpur University, that I told her, that I actually needed the leave last week to take part in the #Hokkolorob protest, for the sake of my University, my classmates, and lastly, for the sake of my beloved city of Joy! I also added that I had been finishing my tasks every day about 15-20 minutes early, so that I could drop in at my University and join the protest!
As she praised my spirit, and wished me luck It gave birth to a form of self-contentment in me; even though I knew what I was doing was right, the courage to admit the fact fearlessly perhaps, gave me a unique form of confidence and spirit, that filled my heart with self-gratification, similarly as shown in the video:
# Never fear to say what your heart says !
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