Living Life in My Own Terms!

“ I see no harm in flaunting my body if I have a beautiful and spotless one!”

This was the dialogue that shook my mom, resulting in tremendous warfare in my home; even though I failed to detect the actual reason behind the same!

We all appreciate beautiful skin and satisfy our aesthetic senses with the same, then what is wrong with being honest?


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As a child, I always dreamt of living life on my own terms! I fought endlessly with my family when they turned me down simply because I strongly believed in carpe diem ideology “Oh! Yes! Abhi!” (let us do it now). It troubled me a lot, as and when I failed to communicate my ideas and beliefs with my parents (which is perhaps the most common problem of all teenagers).

Considering myself to be the most unlucky person on Earth, I spent hours crying endlessly and imagining myself attempting to suicide. I even daydreamt how my family members would possibly react, when they find my dead body!

It was only during my graduation first year that I came across that particular person, whom I instantly recognized as my role model and the person who transformed my life overnight! He was my English professor; a family member who is distantly related to me in terms of blood relationships!


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Throughout my life, I have been a mediocre student, securing average grades and lacking confidence in my potentialities. There is no harm in admitting the fact that I could never turn myself, into the most favorite student of my role model; rather I was an ordinary student finding a place in the corner of the classroom!

I even rehearsed several times, in front of the mirror if I ever had to ask questions or sent him text messages formally. I don’t even know how or when he turned gradually into my friend, philosopher, mentor or my second father!  Yes! I think the relationship I shared with him, can aptly be described as a father-daughter relationship, for he actually gave birth to a completely different persona in me by helping me to reinvent myself;  to construct my ideology and lastly to discover the actual meaning of my existence in this world!

Ever since I hit puberty, I found myself drowning in an ocean of endless questions! As I struggled hard to untie a knot, I found another ten knots to be untied first before that particular knot! None of my family members, teachers or known ones succeeded in quenching my thirst for knowledge, pertaining to sexuality or gender issues!


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 I wondered, why does everybody suggest that I am different? Why do they have issues with me? Why my mother is insulted by my school teachers or community members repeatedly? What is my fault?

And my struggle continued to be a good daughter; much like my sister who was considered to be an ideal lady, because she has always been submissive (compared to my aggressive nature), she gave up her hobbies (which I never did so) and her small likes and dislikes (simply because she could never raise her voice and proclaim that she would do so)!

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It was only six years back that I found true meaning of my life, keeping aside all sorts of social restrictions imposed on a girl! At last I met that particular person of my life, who explained me that, being different is nothing wrong and there is no hard and fast rule that everyone must be stereotypical in nature; it is just the patriarchal tools and apparatuses that teach a woman to turn into a submissive weaker sex!

Perhaps I could never achieve first-class grades, in my graduation and remained as an ordinary English Honors graduate! But, I take pride in myself for not being a hypocrite full of bookish knowledge (which begins and ends merely on the examination paper) and for gathering the courage, never to compromise with my ideology under any circumstances!

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All these years I have been striving hard every day, to apply the knowledge I gained, in my personal life. Most of the times I failed, but at times I succeeded too, in educating people and making them understand the reality behind the masks!

Thanks to my professor (or my second father) today I prefer to be a complete woman without any regrets, rather than merely being a good daughter (or an ideal fiance) bypassing my social responsibilities strategically!

Share your stories, how a family member has helped you to grow into a self-reliant complete individual much like the HDFC film, #MyFamilyMyPride ad film:

Post sponsored by HDFC Life! For more details, visit:


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